Learning By Rote

I had a lovely surprise in chat yesterday afternoon. I bumped into a man I met a long time ago and thought I’d lost touch with when he made the big move to the country. He was the first man I ever met from chat and yes my first sexual encounter. (So I’ll never forget him). We reminisced a bit online and he asked about my sex life. I usually want to scream when people ask me that in chat but with old friends it's not so bad. I don't often have a positive response but still we chatted on. I told him about my blogs. That's one why to catch up! (So if you come back for more this one's for you. Kiss). He makes me feel a bit better about being so weird and repressed. Reminds me there's a lot of other sensual things to do in bed.

It was quite a journey to visit him at his home during his lunch hour. I can’t remember if he knew I was a virgin or not. (I do know the guy I lost my virginity to didn’t know until some time later). I think we must have had some rapport going if I felt “safe” enough to take the risk of visiting him. (Okay, maybe I was just REALLY horny and wanted to kick start my sex life). He offered me oral sex. That was scary but seemed less scary then intercourse. (I still have trouble asking a guy to wear a condom).

He wasn't sure I was going to show up. (I wasn't either). But I got there and was waiting in his drive way. (How cute). We went in. I don't know what we said. It was so long ago and he didn't have much time so we got straight to it. I sat on the couch and he pulled my pants and undies off and dove right in. I had no idea what it would be like but it felt amazing. In retrospect going in without expectations helped a lot. I don't think I had an orgasm but it really was an amazing feeling. I was pretty terrified. I wouldn't have minded a kiss or more but I just didn't know what to do and was too shy to do anything anyway. He went to the kitchen for some water and later I found out a wank to relieve himself. I'd never seen or touched a penis I couldn't do that to him then. It was all too much. I was still surprised to find myself there half naked. I'm sorry I couldn't handle doing more but I also really enjoyed what you did for me.

His last name is Rote; what a gift for a writer! How could I not use that heading? This one’s for you Mr Rote! As you can see I’m still learning.

Jokes aside maybe repetition would do me well, a bit of sexercise, if you will. I never seem to have enough time or a regular enough partner to learn with and so almost every sexual encounter is like starting at all over again. Difficult and nerve wrecking! I’m not cut out for quickies. I take time, and perhaps too much effort. Sigh.

It was quite a while before I met up with Rote again. We still didn't have sex but we had a very nice time touching and kissing each other. I returned the favour that time too.

By the way, it was bloody hard finding a photo of a man going down on a woman. Blow jobs, no problem! The search wasn’t without its pleasures, a quick rub and a sigh of relief, but still let’s give women what they want too! Pussy Power!

Mr Rote looks a lot better than that guy, but as I say it was hard to find what I want and I did want an older guy with a younger woman. (Her body's way nicer than mine. That was going to be implied but I felt compelled to point it out anyway). He has long blonde hair and a beard. Like a great big, hairy Viking as I explained to a close girlfriend at the time. I hope he doesn’t mind the description. I find facial hair very sexy; even a bit of stubble when I’m kissing someone feels very nice. A bread and oral sex though! Lick and tickle me happy.

Yes, I'm sure I can be better and happier with sex if I had the time and the right partner(s). I wish I didn't need my hand held so much but it seems to be who I am at this stage in my life. I want sex to be good and I want to be good at sex.